Category Archives: Photography


The One For Me, Fatty

16th June 2011

Family Portrait at EJs in New York

A few months back, my stick thin friend AJ and I began a cruel joke. Calling each other fat. There was songs, pinched cheeks, and chubby jokes thrown around daily.

It got to the point where he would show up to where we worked, with breakfast for me. A thoughtful gesture to an unassuming outsider. An evil tempting trick, to us. I would slowly chew on half of a delicious doughnut while giving a toothy grinning AJ my most intense death stare.

I just spent two weeks with AJ visiting me in Los Angeles. The goal was to try to prove to him that it wasn’t as horrible as his east coast mind thought it was. I thought of all my favorite places I could show him around to. The thing is, other than Amoeba and the park that I walk around in, all I was left with was a list of my favorite diners and restaurants.

AJ’s vacation soon became an extension of my end of the fat jokes. Payback for the endless breakfast that fueled my days, back in New York.

Feeding Fase

I began to document all of the places we were going for meals. He began to catch on. We found the humor in this ongoing joke and I’m glad I have photos to prove it.

There’s something about having a meal with AJ that seems to open up the flood gates of deep conversations. A bowl of grits and a cup of coffee was typically accompanied with a personal therapy session, a page or two filled in a sketch book, and collaborative ideas for how to remain creative while affording to live.

Just two starving artist, bonding over fat jokes and a medium rare burger.

I took AJ to the airport this morning at an hour too early to make him grab breakfast with me. I didn’t see the point in getting eating alone so its back to my lonely days of coffee and cartoons until next time I see him.


9th June 2011

We went into Scoops on Melrose to get, what I’ve been told, was some of the best ice cream in Los Angeles.

James ordered his 2nd red velvet meal of the afternoon, found a shady spot, and made a phone call to his mother back in New York. The only thing I could understand from the conversation was this:

“That was to work on a sleeve”

(mom on the other line)

“Well, its probably good that you don’t know what a sleeve is, then”

(mom responds with something)

“No, Mom. Its not like a Prince Albert.”

Best Bragging

1st June 2011

If I were to put up an ad for a friend, I imagine it would look a bit like this:

Mid 20′s female looking for male, not less than 2 years older, who doesn’t want to lay his man pipe in my nether region.

No vegans need apply. ( I enjoy exploring food too much)

Applicant must be ok with meat eating, an occasional punch to the shoulder when acting out of line, daily use f the sentence “go fuck yourself”, and my checkered past (ska music)

other perks, for me, include:

  • aimless walking
  • not awkward silence
  • understanding that, in a phone conversation, “im hanging up on you” means “I love you. Good bye”, in cynical Chloe language
  • eating what I bake despite the outcome or your dietary restrictions
  • someone who can wittily tease me when I’m making a bad decision
  • someone who enjoys live music and is probably willing to spot me
  • knowing the right times to ask “Are you ok?” and when to pretend that nothing is wrong
  • bashing on Los Angeles, but not your friends for moving there
  • Applicant should not be opposed to fly to said place of bashing, if necessary to my well being.

To find one person in your life who will do any of these things for you, is something worth living for. The fact that I have three of them, is obscene!

    James, Smo, and AJ are three people who I would do pretty much anything for…Like braving karaoke bars and Time Squares Toys R Us on christmas eve.

    When I first started thinking about this post, I wanted to mention that they came about at three very sharp turns in my life and helped me get through them. Thinking about it more, though, thats not true. They’ve made the shifts in my life happen. Memorable friends make you rethink you’re life and help ease you though the necessary transition. Sometimes without you even realizing.

    Since day 1 of meeting each of them, they’ve been there for me .  They’re the reason why I haven’t been able to let life run me down for the part couple of years and without them, I probably wouldn’t write anything positive, or anything at all.

    An example of how fantastic I find my friends:

    When I lived with James, he drunkenly stumbled in to the house and touched my friends doughnut after she asked him not to. The guilt hit him so had when he sobered up, that he searched out the exact type of doughnut he had touched and bought her an entire box…..which I ate…..

    I love them so much and am so lucky to have these guys who get along with each other just as well as we do.

    I get to pick them up at the airport tomorrow, and the thought of seeing them has been making it difficult to sleep in, get work done, drink water properly, comprehend Ebay, herd kittens, and do other daily tasks.

    The End.

    21st May 2011

    I was supposed to have a late birthday party in my backyard, today. Then I got word that it was going to rain and that we were all going to die, anyway. So needless to say, my party has been postponed indefinitely.

    According to the bible, May 21st is the day of the rapture. I don’t feel like its fair to bluntly tease the Christians for putting so much of their time and money into this campaign. (I just marveled over the classic web design they had a pastors son create). Being raised a Catholic, I can say that although I don’t take the thought of Jesus sucking people up into the clouds very seriously, I can understand where there may have been a miscommunication. The bible is no better than a teenage daughter with a blooming social life. So vague and passive aggressive when you ask ANYTHING!

    The term “the Rapture” refers to the action of “being caught up in”.  A term that was just taken a bit too literally. I personally enjoy living here and don’t know if I’m ready to have this guy come back after thousands of years and take some things I love away from me! Instead, why doesn’t he just take away some of the nuisances on earth and leave us with an overall better world?

    If you could have some the rapture take something away, what would it be? For me it would be:

    • Diablo Cody
    • banana flavored everything
    • people who openly sobbed over Michael Jacksons death
    • Fritos chips.
    • the word abbreviation F.T.W. and F.M.L.
    • people who use the term”fuck my life”
    • whoever thought thick plastic packaging for a new pair of scissors was a brilliant idea
    • Dora the Explorer
    • whatever “dubstep” is
    • the asshole who created Nextel phones
    • airport ticketing cops
    • all men who wear fedoras and weren’t born in Cuba in the 1930′s
    • all men who own a flat iron
    • those really cool girls who always need to let you know that they don’t get along with girls.
    • anyone who makes a voice that resembles that of a South Park character
    • Mogwai
    • umbrellas

    I would also not be offended if the Rapture took away the band The Rapture and replaced the popularity that they got with better bands like Menomena.

    How Tuesday: Make A $400 Book

    21st February 2011

    As much as I love my iPhone, I seem to misplace and drop it to the extent where that must look pretty questionable. I don’t do well with phone cases, so I made a new home for my phone out of an old book.

    for this project, you will need:

    • a phone
    • a hardcover book that is larger than said phone
    • a pencil
    • paper glue
    • a pencil
    • a piece of ribbon
    • an Xacto knife
    • a brush or sponge of some sort

    place your phone where you plan on it being planted

    trace the phone with a pencil

    cut into he outlined area, a few pages at a time

    continue cutting into the pages, being aware that as you get further into the book, the pages are going to try to shift your alignment.

    So make sure that you’re pages are aligned, by making an L shape with your book before cutting

    cut until your phone becomes flush with the book

    then start gluing. Starting from the back of the book, place some glue on the page and even it out with a brush.

    This helps make sure that the pages don’t get wet and wavy because of the glue.

    on the last full page, glue only around the edges and attach a ribbon. Since its right below the phone, the ribbon helps pop the phone out of the book. Not to mention that it really works like a bookmark, while gluing the pages. Every couple of pages of gluing, press the pages together to make sure that everything is properly aligned. The ribbon is a good marker that helped me remember where I left off.

    Let it dry overnight, and then you have the worlds most overpriced book!

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