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Rest In Peace, 2010.

30th December 2010

This year was filled with things have permanently impacted my life. I never want to forget them. Heres a list of a few highlights:

  • My new Kitchenaid mixer
  • CANs Ege Bamyasi album
  • Learning about gardening
  • My weekend at Skate camp
  • Meeting my dad
  • Charlie, the pup
  • Discovering the shortest route to JFK by train
  • The clone tool, in Photoshop
  • Cowboy steak (steak marinated with coffee grounds, brown sugar, salt, and pepper)
  • The TWO times that chocolate almost killed my dog.
  • Northeast Kingdom brunches
  • Learning how to harvest marijuana
  • Valentines Day.
  • Learning to make my own jewlery
  • My kangaroo suit, that I got for my birthday (thanks mom!)
  • 5 hour long lunches on Tuesdays, with Bee.
  • Poaching eggs in tomato sauce
  • Learning that if you layer lipstick with powder, then another coat of lipstick, it’ll last much longer
  • Living room hang outs with James, on Chatroulette
  • Smoov-e
  • Hitting rocks that made unusual sounds

  • Learning how to edit videos
  • Ginger dipped in dark chocolate
  • Fracturing a rib, during a Mothers of Mercy/ Blacklisted show
  • Owning a chinchilla for a few months
  • Learning how to shuck oysters
  • Always getting a motivational push from Bettina May
  • Learning how to operate shot guts, handguns, and assault riffles
  • Working in a bakery
  • Creating the ShitJamesSaid twitter account
  • My trip to Ellicott City, MD
  • Not wearing pants at all for over a month
  • learning how to make royal icing
  • Knitting/ craft night failures with Sam
  • Finding the easiest way to clean a handheld blender
  • Eliminating boys who flirt by call me “tough guy” or “kid”, from my life.
  • Getting to see The Specials play, thanks to Smo.
  • How I Met Your Mother
  • Going from the bar to the Today Show with Courtney
  • Phadwa
  • My dorky love for Veronica Mars
  • My introduction to Black Cat Espresso
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The Catastrophe and The Calm

28th December 2010

Remember when it began snowing and I thought it was just lovely? What an asshole, I was.

I thought it was so lovely out, that I even took a stroll out to Shake Shack and received some ice cream with my burger.

I looked down at my hands to see that the lack of blood rushing to them, had turned my fingers into a nice shade of violet. Then I saw lightening and realized it was probably serious enough to get back inside.

Now, the distance between my train stop and my front door, usually consists of a 5 minute walk.

Getting of the train in the middle of a really intense blizzard was a different story. Opening my eyes left me too venerable to letting hail, snow, and wind blind me. after having my face cut open by the weather conditions, I figured out the only way to walk home safely. Backwards. I walked down an abandoned street, backwards, in 30 mph wind. It took me a half an hour to get home.

Then I proceeded to go a bit stir crazy, in my house.

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When The sun emerged, its was calm enough to go out and take a look at the aftermath. I always thought I was an anti-snow kind of girl, but I love the way it looks outside! So surreal.

 

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Christmas Labor

24th December 2010

Its not JUST santa and his elves that slave around in anticipation for tomorrow. Santa is a man who has a lot of average people working ridiculous jobs over the holiday season, as well. While walking around Midtown, yesterday, I found some pretty dedicated Christmas workers.

A breakdancing reindeer (a.k.a. your friend from high schools dad); Minnie Mouse in Santa suit

My best guess for what these people were, were Sugar Plums. The fact that they refused to speak and that I’ve never seen a sugar plum only makes my theory more factual.

The Salvation Army was out doing that thing they do every year while you’re waiting for someone outside of a store. Ringing that bell until you cave and give them a dollar just for a few seconds of silence. The wisest upgrade on their part, was this dashing young lad who had  decided to replace his bell with a mic to serenade me.

The man whos job was to guide you  away from a Macys fire exit and toward Santa, almost made my day. That was until AJ, one of my closest friends, saw how sad I was that no one was dressed as a marsupial. He threw on my kangaroo suit and made a lot of little kids very happy and large adults very scared, simultaneously.

What a fantastic Christmas, its been so far!

All photos were taken by Chloe Rice

Except for the last one, which was obviously taken by an elf.

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a toast!

24th November 2010

Unirkey by Alex Pardee

Happy Thanksgiving! I’m thankful for pretty much every curve ball that gets thrown my way, and the people who are there to lovingly tease me when I fall and bruise. Here is a toast!

To good health. *1

To feeling loved from the people I love the most.

To my friends who keep me in mind everyday.

To subway carts that go above ground.

To the skill of sewing.

To making things in my head into things that can be seen.

To Trader Joes waffles with honey.

To a fresh pair of Docs and  warm argyle socks, when the seasons start to change.

To the perfect view from my front door.

To an appreciation of music. Thanks, ears!

To burgers made without buns.

To good finds at second hand stores.

To a year of memorable shows.

To Charlie, for being a well behaved dog

well…most of the time.

To people who can make my day better, just by being themselves.

To chocolate chip pancakes being considered a breakfast item.

To list making.

To always having access to a swing set. *2

To being able to see my family today.

Other honorable mentions: mild Fall days, PG Tips, my cozy little bedroom, milkshakes with Nutella, personalized ringtones, good roommates, huge windows in my apt, central park, netflix, a good wool coat, still having hair after so many dye jobs, steamed vegetables,  tits, condiments, being in a city full of good coffee and 24 hour bodegas, good books that fit in small purses, always having a charged Nintendo DS, still getting mix CDs, lavender soap, and owning a good camera.

I LOVE Thanksgiving because its just a perfect time to think of everything I love, to eat other peoples left overs, and to watch the parade in hopes of it falling on a very windy day. If you don’t care for thanksgiving though, thats fine too! Perhaps you will, at least, enjoy this poem.

*1: Photo by Bettina May

*2: Photo by Bee Jellyfish-Love

All other photos on the list are by Chloe Rice


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How Long, Chocolate Death Dog?

6th November 2010

I was pretty sure I learned everything there was to know about chocolate and dogs after my chiuhauha had once licked a Milky Way bar and my ex decided to google “how long chocolate death dog?”. The dog was fine and the google term became a running joke often repeated in a super hero voice.

Turns out the legitimate answer to how long it takes before chocolate can start to really kill a dog, is around 6 hours. Thats how long it takes for the caffeine in chocolate to fully absorb into your pups bloodstream and raise its heart rate to the point of  inducing a seizure or making it pump at such an accelerated pace, that it just gives out. The darker the chocolate, the more the caffeine percentage, the more likely the outcome.

What the hell, Charlie? You can protect me from the undead but can’t handle a little bit of candy?!

Why do I know about it this time around? My room mate left an ounce of 70% dark chocolate out for Charlie while I was out, yesterday. When I came home she was really hyper and alert. Just tweakin out! My room mate kept saying they should pump her stomach or feed her hydrogen peroxide. I thought she was nuts but apparently both are theories that work. Only when caught almost immediately after the dog ingests, though.

The emergency vet told me that her heart rate was over twice of what it should be. Indicating that the caffeine had already set in, making it too late to pump her little stomach. The only thing they could do at that point, is pump her full of water and charcoal in order to filter the toxins through her kidneys. Basically the same regimen that our household gives ourselves after a night of hard drinking. Something I went to after I saw the vet bill.

So heres what I’ve learned of what to do when you’ve poisoned your dog:

  • Do not waste your time calling poison control. They don’t deal with animals.
  • Don’t waste your time calling the ASPCA hotline. The try to charge you $65 dollars for advice, which in these cases, is always “take your pet to the vet”
  • If you’re dog ate milk chocolate, I wouldn’t panic too much because of the low cacao percentage.
  • If you’re dog ate dark chocolate, I’d suggest a quiet panic, as to not excite the canine any more.
  • If you’re dog eats it within an hour or so, try force feeding it peroxide to induce puking. (1 tsp for smaller dogs, 2 tsp for larger dogs)
  • According to this article, my toy poodle would have been able to digest charcoal pills. In retrospect, I should have given her a charcoal pill while continuously force feeding her water for 24 hours. I may have still be able to pay my rent next month, if I had known.

Luckily, she’s alright and I get to pick her up from the hospital soon enough to be able to watch Saturday Night Live together.

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