If I were to put up an ad for a friend, I imagine it would look a bit like this:
Mid 20′s female looking for male, not less than 2 years older, who doesn’t want to lay his man pipe in my nether region.
No vegans need apply. ( I enjoy exploring food too much)
Applicant must be ok with meat eating, an occasional punch to the shoulder when acting out of line, daily use f the sentence “go fuck yourself”, and my checkered past (ska music)
other perks, for me, include:
not awkward silence
understanding that, in a phone conversation, “im hanging up on you” means “I love you. Good bye”, in cynical Chloe language
eating what I bake despite the outcome or your dietary restrictions
someone who can wittily tease me when I’m making a bad decision
someone who enjoys live music and is probably willing to spot me
knowing the right times to ask “Are you ok?” and when to pretend that nothing is wrong
bashing on Los Angeles, but not your friends for moving there
Applicant should not be opposed to fly to said place of bashing, if necessary to my well being.
To find one person in your life who will do any of these things for you, is something worth living for. The fact that I have three of them, is obscene!
James, Smo, and AJ are three people who I would do pretty much anything for…Like braving karaoke bars and Time Squares Toys R Us on christmas eve.
When I first started thinking about this post, I wanted to mention that they came about at three very sharp turns in my life and helped me get through them. Thinking about it more, though, thats not true. They’ve made the shifts in my life happen. Memorable friends make you rethink you’re life and help ease you though the necessary transition. Sometimes without you even realizing.
Since day 1 of meeting each of them, they’ve been there for me . They’re the reason why I haven’t been able to let life run me down for the part couple of years and without them, I probably wouldn’t write anything positive, or anything at all.
An example of how fantastic I find my friends:
When I lived with James, he drunkenly stumbled in to the house and touched my friends doughnut after she asked him not to. The guilt hit him so had when he sobered up, that he searched out the exact type of doughnut he had touched and bought her an entire box…..which I ate…..
I love them so much and am so lucky to have these guys who get along with each other just as well as we do.
I get to pick them up at the airport tomorrow, and the thought of seeing them has been making it difficult to sleep in, get work done, drink water properly, comprehend Ebay, herd kittens, and do other daily tasks.
“To me, passionate love has been like a tight shoe rubbing blisters on my Achilles’ heel. I resent it and love it and wallow and recover and it’s all part of ‘life’s rich pattern’ and I wish to God I could handle it, but I never have and I know I never will.”
-Noël Coward, excerpted from The Noël Coward Diaries
Why do people want pets or kids, when you can have a pendulum!!!
Is it weird that I find this cute? Should I be concerned that I may be forming an emotional attachment to weights on strings? Its better than being one of those weirdos who talks to their plants….right?